Finally, You Can Break Free From The
Passive Aggressive Spell!"
Discover The Secret That Will Liberate You
From The Painful Feelings Created by Your Partner's Passive
Friday, April 19th
My Dear friend,
How often do you look at a happy
couple and feel a pang in your chest? You watch them as they
gaze into each others' eyes and playfully steal a kiss. A
faint smile crosses your lips as you remember the good times
you had with your partner and your heart wonders where they
Do you sometimes feel alone when the one you love is beside
you? Do you sleep in the same bed, but feel miles apart? Are
you afraid of expressing your true feelings for fear your
partner will become angry or isolate himself into his shell?
What would you give to reclaim those carefree feelings you
had when you first fell in love with your partner, to be
able to easily express yourself and have open, honest
communication again? What would you do if the fear was gone?
We all know couples who seem to have unlocked the secret of
finding and maintaining a loving relationship. And, my guess
is you'd like to be one of them... You are not alone!
Have you ever found yourself in situations like
"Every time we got close, he pulled
further away. I could SEE it happening. We'd seem to grow
closer and closer, which made him feel invaded, so he'd
push me away. I'd try to get nearer and he'd back away.
It was a vicious cycle. If I complained, he would blame
ME, saying it was my 'behavior' that drove him away."
"I think he loves me somehow and
that makes it harder to cut the cord. But, if I keep
holding on to the HOPE...the never-ending HOPE that
things will improve, I will be in this same emptiness for
ever. I need help to let go of him."
"I realized I could do anything for
him but it might not matter, because nothing really
changes. He is passive aggressive and I've never knew how
to deal with him along those lines. I've always been
thrown into the cycle of hurt and abuse, instead.
Sound familiar? If so, you may be in a
relationship with a passive aggressive person. A person with
passive aggressive behavior might exhibit some of the
Your partner will procrastinate,
leave work undone, or "forget" to fulfill his
share of tasks.
When asked about his problems,
this person will make excuses or blame others.
He is often found to omit
information or lie; if confronted, his temper easily
He may be more prone to cheating
in a long-term relationship or marriage.
He may deny his behavior or
claim he has good intentions.
He denies his emotions and has a
lack of commitment.
He instigates arguments for any
If you think you are in a relationship
with a passive aggressive person - there is help! You don't
have to suffer the pain, humiliation, and sadness one day
Read the following unsolicited
testimony about how Judith and Mary overcome their difficult
Meet For Coffee
After months, my friend Mary and I
met for coffee. We spent hours catching up on each
others' lives, talking about jobs, husbands, and kids. It
was almost like old times, but something was different in
Mary. Finally, she admitted she was depressed. She said
she had done everything she could for her husband, but
she felt stressed by his unloving behavior and was
overwhelmed at the negative turn of their relationship.
"I'm so confused," she
admitted. "I can't talk to him anymore. He blames me
for everything that is wrong and I feel guilty all of the
time. I'm so alone, Judith. What am I doing wrong?"
I wanted to shout out to her,
"It's not your fault! Don't blame yourself!"
But, she wouldn't have heard me.
She continued with her laundry list of negative
interactions and expressed guilt at not being able to
solve her husband's problems. Time and time again he
blamed her for his misery. He withheld love when he was
unhappy or angry, and so she felt very isolated.
"He tells me he loves me, Judith,
and I believe he does. He just doesn't show it," Mary
exclaimed. "Last week I spent two hours making his
favorite dinner and I bought an expensive wine. I was so
excited at the thought of spending a romantic night with
him." I saw a tear from in her eye. "He came home from
work hours late. He didn't call. When I asked him why he
was late, he yelled at me for "hounding him!" I just
wanted one night with him, without the kids, so we could
reconnect. It didn't work," she gulped.
My mind was racing with suggestions
on how she could change her situation. I really wanted to
help my friend, and I thought I knew how I could.
"Well," I told her. "You would not
believe what has happened in my life since we last
talked. Do you remember the problems I had with my boss?
They were similar to yours. I never said anything to him
either when he lashed out."
Mary looked up and caught my eye,
"Yes, you were in the same situation."
She looked SO SAD. I felt my heart
breaking for her. She sighed, "Did you do anything
I reached across the table and took
her hand as I told her, "I made a decision that changed
my life! It took me a long time, but, I am SO glad I did
I finally had her attention. She
looked hopeful. "What did you do?" She asked me.
"I fought back," I told her..."Just
not the way he does!" I laughed. "Look, I did some
research. I knew I wasn't the only person out there who
had a negative boss, or who had to deal with passive
aggressive people. I found this amazing e-book that
offers suggestions on how to respond in any situation.
Mary, it is such a relief to know that now when he says
something to me, I know how to respond!"
Mary looked shocked. "I grew up
learning that to be a good person I had to listen to
other people's problems and let them vent ...I never
questioned that I could respond any differently!"
I nodded in agreement. "I know,
Mary. But, after years of giving into his ranting, and
letting him accuse me or blame me for things I couldn't
control, I was feeling, well ...worthless. I decided I
wasn't going to take it anymore! I was going to respect
myself, and not let him abuse me one more day."
Mary looked suspicious. "So, how
did this e-book help? Didn't he just get angrier when you
tried to defend yourself?"
"Well, I smiled thinking about my
boss's reaction the first time I said something back to
him, "in the beginning, yea! But, I'm not helpless
anymore. Now, I know what to say to protect myself. By
being silent I was empowering him to continue his abuse,
and every day I was feeling more helpless and less in
control of myself."
Mary was not convinced. "Well, what
can I do? I love my husband, and I don't want to leave
him. Honestly, Judith, I am scared he'll react even more
negatively towards me, and it is bad enough already."
"I understand why you are afraid,
Mary." I told her. What I am learning though, is the
difference between being assertive and being aggressive.
You can be assertive and still be a nice person. It is
like you just said, we were taught be nice, to give in to
others, to make others want to "like us." We never
learned how to assert ourselves and defend ourselves.
It's no wonder we don't know how to respond in this kind
of passive aggressive situations!
"And, you learned this?" Mary was
"Incredible, I know." I told her.
"This e-book is the single most valuable investment I
have ever made in myself. It is prepared by a life coach
who offers real-life situations and realistic responses.
You can read a section, study the recommended tips, and
then when the time comes, apply them to your life. It is
reassuring to know I can defend myself without being
aggressive myself while denouncing his destructive
behavior. I feel more confident and more self-assured," I
told her. "I know it sounds crazy, but I feel safe and
secure. I am happier at work because I am not afraid of
his reactions anymore. I really wish you'd try it, Mary.
I am convinced it would help you just like it helped me!"
She looked at me and I saw a
glimpse of my old friend. "You know, I AM going to try
it. Something has to change and if it worked for you..."
"It WILL work for you, too!" I told
"So, tell me how I can get my
hands on this magical book."
Go Ahead ...Break the Rules
struggling to find some basic peace, trust and happiness in
your current relationships?
Do you crave open, honest
communication with your partner?
Do you think you could have
respect only if you understood the other person better?
Do you want to discover happiness
and learn the secrets happy couples everywhere have
If you answered "yes" to any of these questions it is
time to learn how to control your future and discover the
secrets to reclaiming your full love life. If you feel
trapped in an unhappy relationship, or if you are tired of
useless confrontations with your loved one, it is time to
make a change.
"I wish I had know from the beginning what I know now. I
feel things would have been so different, and neither of
us would have suffered the amount of pain, drama and
humiliation we did, especially me, since "everything
was my fault"
, according to him, of course. I was the perfect
personality type to be the victim for a passive
aggressive boyfriend, as my mother is passive aggressive,
too. Ironically, this has been the cause of my
painful inability to establish a positive self-esteem and
find happiness in my life. I feel so blessed to have
found this book. Nora, you are a great coach. I now have
permission to fight back! The awareness you have given me
has changed my life. I am no longer a
victim to passive aggressive people, and it feels
- Denise Withers, Pennsylvania
No Matter What They Say, It's Not
All Your Fault..
As young girls we were taught to put our needs behind
the needs of others. We saw our mothers do it, we saw our
mothers' mothers do it. It was selfless and kind, while
there were no warranties that you would be happy this way.
But now you need the tools to assert yourself while earning
respect from other people.
Do you remember the most "life rules "
that you learned at home?
Take care of
others before yourself.
own feelings to make your family happy.
when you are upset.
You can't have
your own life - your life is with your family.
confrontational to your partner or other family members.
harmful behavior from your partner because he is stressed.
Does it sound familiar?
Along my entire life I heard some variation or other
of these "Life Rules." And, sadly, for almost four decades,
I believed them to be the way to deal with others!
But, they ARE NOT true!!!.
YOU are an
individual person, and have your own, valid needs.
YOU are worthy
of respect and love.
And, YOU have
the ability to shape your life - in ANY WAY you
Nora, You saved my marriage!
My husband of twenty years is a passive aggressive
person, and it was very difficult to live with him. He
wouldn't remember any of my good aspects, but only
the negative ones. It seemed that nothing was ever good
enough for him. He had unrealistic expectations, and
could only see things in "black or white." He
would forget promises, make decisions without consulting
me, and be very abusive. He blamed me for
everything, called me names, and yelled at
me. However, I was the only person he
would treat like this. He wouldn't do it with ANYONE
ELSE! After years it became too much humiliation for me.
I couldn't cope with the sadness anymore. I felt hopeless
and alone. I believed I had two options for my life; stay
in an unhappy marriage, or leave my husband.
Then, I read your e-book. And I stopped blaming
him, and saw that I had to learn new tricks!
You provided me with simple, easy-to-follow
solutions that were on-target and applicable to my
situation. I learned exact phrases I could use when
communicating with him...and, they worked! I was
desperate to develop a better relationship with my
husband. And, now, thanks to you, I have a more loving,
respectful marriage than ever before! Thank you! Thank
you! Your e-book saved my marriage and I have never been
Ann Marie Bellinghouse Montreal ,
Quebec , CA
The 10 Secrets... That Will
By tonight YOU will know
your self-confidence and improve your self-esteem.
specifically on your needs and desires.
confrontational situations with poise and assurance.
yourself in an assertive way, without losing credibility
difficult issues with confidence and ease.
and respect your beliefs.
your anger and frustrations without letting these feelings
being the "savior" of destructive personalities.
better care of yourself.
your support system.
You don't have to feel overwhelmed, confused, or hurt
one more day! Now you can have the tools you need to
function in a difficult relationship. If a person you love
reacts to you in a passive aggressive way, there is help.
You can learn how to respond to them, how to react in any
situation, and how to enjoy your life again !
Instead of lying in bed at night only wishing for him
to change - you can be the instrument of change! By
knowing what to expect and how to respond, you will have the
confidence you need to make life-altering adjustments in
your relationships. You will be happier. He will be happier.
You will experience more peace and control.
By mastering these skills you will never again be a
victim to passive aggressive behavior. You can finally free
yourself of the emotional roller coaster ride you've been
on; you can learn to trust yourself again, and you can feel,
once and for all, truly happy with your life.
But, only read this Book if you are ready for a
change. Are you prepared to release your own pent-up
resentment and anger? Are you ready to stop waiting for him
to change, and to take control of your relationship moving
it into a whole new direction? If so, this e-book is for
you, because there WILL BE change. Your relationship will be
different. You will feel secure. You will look forward to a
happy future with the person you love. Are you ready for
this kind of change?
What is THe
Passive Aggressive Spell, and How you Can Escape
Do you often feel like you don't deserve full
happiness in your love life? In the midst of an
aggressive situation do you find yourself accepting what
is being said as the truth? Do you feel guilty after an
argument or try to think of what you could have done
differently? Have you ever thought, "What if I could only
give more attention, more care, more of my time? Then,
everything will be ok and he will love me."
If you have ever thought this,
then you are already under the Passive Aggressive Spell.
One day you are happy and contently living the
relationship of your dreams. You love him, he loves you.
You know what to expect in your relationship. Then, one
day...BAM! He reacts to you with a lot of hostility, not
related to the here and now, and you feel confused and
hurt. Maybe things get back to normal for a while, and
then it happens again. And, just when you feel you have
made progress in your relationship your partner suddenly,
and without provocation, withdraws from you and retreats
into hostile silence. The cycle continues, with episodes
occurring more frequently, until you feel lost and alone.
He promises to change, so when he reverts to his old ways
you feel dejected, let down, and alone ...again and
The more frequently you experience the ups and downs
of a passive aggressive relationship, the more you accept
it. Doubts will seep into your mind about the validity of
his words and you will wonder if you -perhaps- deserve this
treatment. You will feel guilty because you can't make your
partner happy and you will question his love for you.
What is the cost of this emotional tidal wave?
Your self-esteem takes the toll, and the price is very
Maybe you recall some of the "Life Rules"
we mentioned earlier... Put others before yourself, hide or
conceal your true feelings for the happiness of others,
don't be confrontational, overlook harmful behavior from
your partner because he is stressed.
These are antiquated and old-fashioned ideas, and they
do not make you or your partner happier in a relationship.
They make you feel inferior, emotionally drained, confused,
and manipulated. Every time you give in to passive
aggressive behavior you lose a piece of yourself. You
forfeit a piece of your confidence and your self-esteem.
Have you tried to have a candid conversation with your
partner, only for it backfire or escalate into a full-blown
argument? Instead of understanding and compassion you are
met with accusations, verbal abuse, or deafening silence.
Or, perhaps he seems to understand. He feels regretful for
his actions and reaches out to you. You eagerly accept this
act of apology because you are starving for the affection
and attention you once had in your relationship. You think
everything will return to normal. You are once again, hooked
by the passive aggressive spell because eventually his
loving behavior subsides and you are once again confronted
with anger and aggression. You fear confrontation and slowly
you become more and more a victim of passive aggressive
You are not alone...
Hi. My name is Natasha Taylor. I'd hate to think
of what my life would be like today if I hadn't purchased
"Recovering from Passive Aggression." I had been in a
relationship with my boyfriend for almost 10 years. We
grew up together. Our families were friends. He was my
high-school sweetheart. For years everything was perfect
- or, as perfect as it could be for two teenagers.
But, we were very much in love. Our carefree lives seemed
to revolve around each other.
Then, when we married and had children, something
in his personality changed. He became more aggressive,
more easily agitated, and less loving. It was only a
slight difference at first. I thought it was because of
post-college stress. I made excuses for his behavior. He
was like a miniature version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
Some days he would be the normal, loving man I had known
for so many years, and other days he was a complete
stranger to me. One night it escalated into a huge
argument, and I knew I had to do something to change our
relationship. He was angry and his temper flared so
violently that I was afraid he might hit me. For the
first time in my life I was scared of him.
The next day I started researching passive
aggressive behavior. That is when I found this e-book. It
offered a three-month trial and a full 100% money-back
guarantee. What did I have to lose?
I downloaded the book and in minutes was learning
valuable information I knew would change my life. Things
have never been better for my boyfriend and me. I am not
sure what the future holds for us, but I know I can now
expect that we move forward with a loving, respectful,
and caring attitude towards one another, and I know that
it is all thanks to the information I learned in this
e-book. Nothing less will do for me!
Thank you so much!
Natasha Taylor - Baton Rouge
the Signs before it's too late..
Repetitive interactions with a
passive aggressive person can leave you feeling
emotionally drained, dejected, and distressed. So, how do
you know if the relationships in your life are causing
your unhappiness? There are indicators that point to
passive aggressive behavior and its hidden anger as one
heavy influence in your own moods. In order to accurately
judge your relationships it is important for you to
recognize the signs.
unprovoked outbursts that are disproportionate to the
pouting, or retreating into his world.
oblivious to your feelings.
blocking you from communication.
sensitive and caring one minute; acting aggressive the
These behaviors are not only confusing and hard to
accept, but they damage your confidence and self-esteem.
The vicious passive aggressive cycle can take its toll on
you, slowly altering your personality, until you barely
recognize your own actions. You feel depressed, you might
cry or yell more often than before, and you feel out of
"My husband of 15 years is verbally and
emotionally abusive. About six months ago I
realized he is passive aggressive. He criticizes me,
complains about everything, and insults me. He doesn't
listen but responds to me with abusive anger, gives me
the silent treatment, or blames and accuses me for our
problems. He does not admit he is an abuser, but blames
me for causing annoyance to him."
Belinda - Akron , Ohio
If you think passive aggressive behavior is the cause
of your unhappy situation there are steps you can take to
manage its impact on your life. You can learn the conflict
resolution skills you need to manage your life again.
Do you want to deepen your relationship with your
loved one? Do you want to stop the confusion you feel about
your love life? Do you want to regain some of the connection
you had when you first fell in love? Of course you do! And,
you can learn how today by following the easy steps outlined
in this e-book.
If you are ready to break free of the chains of
emotional bondage, if you are tired of feeling humiliated
and alone, if you are ready to take control of your
emotional well-being once and for all, then this e-book is
Do you want to hear more?
"My head feels confused and my thoughts are
consumed with concerns about his behavior,
attitude, and actions. I am trying to deal with it.
I have read other books and internet sites but
I end up with conflicting messages. Some say
"set limits" others say "remain
passive." Remaining passive seems to work
best with my husband. If I try to set limits it
only gives him more reason to abuse me. He rants
and raves and throws things at me. If I agree with
him, then he doesn't have a chance to turn on me.
If I disagree with him, he can't take it and reacts more
abusively. I am beginning to wonder if he is worth it. I
planned to stay with him, but I don't want his
abusiveness to ruin my life. We have five young
children, which makes it tougher to deal with, because
I'm afraid they will learn to behave in this horrible
way also....What can I do?"
Sylvia Britt, Brattleboro, Vt.
Are you ready to learn how to negotiate and communicate with
your loved one like never before? Can you see that NOW
is the time you have been waiting for to make that change?
If the seemingly non-stop confrontational episodes have
taken their toll on you and you are prepared to fight back
for the love of your life, then this e-book will show you
Your Options are Now Open..
How many times have your friends said, "Just leave the
guy?" Easy solution, right? Well, not if you still are in
love with him. While your friends might have your best
interest in mind when they offer advice, they aren't in your
position, and they can't provide guidance objectively. You
know your true feelings for this person. You know you have
seen him at his best, and you know he can be that person
again. Making a break from a passive aggressive person is
one solution. But, if you are committed to your
relationship, you need to have options! You must take
control of your relationship today. You must learn how to
deal with passive aggressive people so they can't torment
your relationships anymore. You don't have to be a victim of
your love life one more day!
In your heart you know you should learn the skills you
need to use in order to be secure and confident in your
relationships. You should discover how to be assertive
without being aggressive. You should identify ways to defend
yourself against difficult people. This process of
retraining yourself and breaking old habits might take time,
but the results will show through in your recovered
relationships and your improved self-esteem.
"Recovering from Passive
Aggression" is awesome! I learned some really
cool things about human nature and interpersonal
relationships. I was able to see myself in some of the
examples, and learn what I was doing to damage some of
my best relationships. This e-book discusses hidden
insecurities we all have and taught me ways to deal
with my own issues, and how to interact with others in
Karen Amos , Washington DC.
You don't have to go through this alone!
The childhood notion of "happily ever after" has been
ingrained in our spirits from birth. Fairy tales and love
stories taught us that hard work, dedication, and true love
could overcome any obstacle. As we matured we were faced
with the harsh reality that life doesn't imitate the big
screen. But, think for a moment about your favorite fairy
tale or love story. How does the heroine finally overcome
her obstacles and achieve true happiness?
She had help. And, now so do you. You don't have to go
through this alone. "Recovering from Passive Aggression" was
designed and written by a relationship expert and a
professional coach who are eager to help you on your journey
to "happily ever after." They will coach and guide you
through your journey of self-discovery, while providing
vital solutions to your most serious questions. They will
help you navigate the deep changes you are seeking in your
life and show you the way to a brighter tomorrow.
"Recovering from Passive Aggression"
This e-book explains the
intricate dance involved in living or working with a
passive aggressive person and offers useful solutions
to dealing with difficult situations as they arise.
You will be guided through
positive conflict management strategies that are
applicable to your current situation. You will be
offered tips for adjusting the influence your partner
has in your relationship. You will begin to identify
the messages your partner is sending regarding his
personal motivations and deep-rooted fears, and you
will understand how to cope with various lifestyle
changes. You will finally know - once and for all -
how to break the passive aggressive spell using some
ideas from positive conflict resolution. As you
implement new techniques you will see a gradual
change in your life. Your partner will respond to you
differently. You will both see an increased happiness
and value in your relationship..
You will feel like a new person!
Meet Your Coaches
During my 20 years as a clinical psychologist, and
again after earning my PhD in Conflict Resolution, I found
myself consistently trying to answer the same question. "Why
do people tear down the same relationship they fought to
Again and again my patients would describe the vicious
cycle they experienced with their loved ones
...insurmountable pressure, humiliation and insecurities,
feelings of worthlessness. I wanted to devise a strategy
that would allow my patients to reclaim their self-esteem
and confidence while dealing with the inevitable challenges
Mainstream problem solving techniques were complex and
difficult to follow. They weren't offering realistic
problem-solving solutions, but rather, were serving as a
band-aid to a bigger problem. No one in my field was telling
women how they could fight back in a loving way and take
control of the situation by implementing positive,
As I continued to meet with patients struggling with
their relationships, I realized it was time for a field
change. I threw myself into research. I investigated lots of
reading materials, I listened to hundreds of patients, and I
opened communication lines with people from various
backgrounds. In the end I was left with one single, powerful
We must learn how to constantly HEAL AND REPAIR our
relationships. We have been programmed to either fight or
quit when a relationship becomes strained. We needed to
learn how to cure our ailing relationships, not run from
them. If we aren't working to heal our relationships then we
aren't using the right tools to build strong, healthy, long
lasting connections, based on mutual love and respect.
The competition-based theory that life produces
winners and losers is detrimental to a positive
relationship. When one partner exerts power in an effort to
control or manipulate the other, and the other partner
accepts it, happiness is diminished. Unless both partners
are encouraged to maintain their self-respect and dignity,
love will not prosper.
The turning point in my research occurred when I
finally heard what my patients weren't saying. I realized
they were craving support, understanding, and compassion
from their partners. But, they had forgotten that the source
of their power lie inside them. They were seeking permission
to be themselves ...permission to reassert their values and
reclaim the respect and self-value they needed for a happy
At that point I began developing the tools they could
use to accomplish this goal. They want to be happy. They
want to be happy with their current partner. I strove to
find the perfect solution that would transform a
relationship from a damaged, unhappy state, into one of
reciprocal cooperation. No longer was there a need for
winners or losers. There was only room for mutual help,
understanding, and respect.
Once the solution was discovered it was compiled into
an easy-to-use action plan called, "Passive Aggressive
Action Steps." These techniques, which are now available in
the "Recovering from Passive Aggression" e-book, are the
same techniques we have used in hundreds of workshops,
seminars, web-conferences, and private coaching sessions for
more than 20 years. And, they can be yours today.
I'm the "relationship guru" on our team, and my main
focus is to increase the quality of love-based relationship
experiences. You might have heard of my latest e-book, "The
Art of Positive Conflict: Transforming Confrontation into
Relationship Harmony." In this ground-breaking guide I offer
useful strategies on surviving a difficult relationship with
love and compassion. As a previous passive aggressive person
in my relationships, I have an invaluable set of information
to share. One of my favorite techniques is called
"Reflective Listening." This tool can connect people on a
whole new level and break through obstacles of defensiveness
and rejection. You don't have to stay in an unhealthy
relationship one more minute. Let us share our tools with
Start Improving Your Love Life in Less than
"Recovering from Passive Aggression" is available to you
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Nora Femenia, PhD. Creative Conflict
Resolutions 3415 Galt OCean Drive Fort
Lauderdale 33308 Florida Phone: +1 (954)
PS: I am so proud of you for taking that
first step to make a positive change in your life. Imagine
...tomorrow you can be a calmer, gentler, happier person.
You won't be easily upset by things people say, you can
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