{"id":28,"date":"2012-10-06T12:18:27","date_gmt":"2012-10-06T12:18:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/passiveaggresive.com\/blog\/?p=28"},"modified":"2012-10-25T18:32:09","modified_gmt":"2012-10-25T18:32:09","slug":"dealing-with-passive-aggressive-behavior","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/passiveaggresive.com\/blog\/dealing-with-passive-aggressive-behavior\/","title":{"rendered":"Dealing with Passive Aggressive Behavior"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Passive aggression is as old as the human race. But, it is far more common in our day and age than it was a century ago.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/passiveaggresive.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/10\/spyglass_view.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-30\" title=\"Spyglass View\" src=\"https:\/\/passiveaggresive.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/10\/spyglass_view-300x225.jpg\" alt=\"walk away woman\" width=\"300\" height=\"225\" srcset=\"https:\/\/passiveaggresive.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/10\/spyglass_view-300x225.jpg 300w, https:\/\/passiveaggresive.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/10\/spyglass_view.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a>Our modern world tends to stifle the traditional outlets for aggression.\u00a0 This drives people into being passive on the outside, because they&#8217;ll be punished if they aren&#8217;t, and aggressive on the inside. Our modern society is full of secret hate<\/p>\n<p>Passive aggressive behavior is the expression of those secret hates.<\/p>\n<p>On the one hand, the person appears passive, yet, on the other, they work tirelessly to undermine other people. What would have been expressed as a violent outburst a hundred years ago and be over with, is now a continuous action that goes on day after day, and builds and builds. This is why so many mass murderers and serial killers are passive aggressive. &#8220;Oh, he was such a nice guy, I can&#8217;t believe he&#8217;d do such a terrible thing.&#8221; Has been said about many a passive aggressive that turned killer.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Here are some indications of passive aggressive behavior that are easy to spot.<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u00a0Talking in generalities such as, &#8220;they think,&#8221; &#8220;they say&#8221; and &#8220;everybody knows.&#8221; When the passive aggressive is questioned, &#8220;everybody&#8221; turns out to be a single person or completely imaginary.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Becoming cheerful or upbeat when seeing another person suffer. Conversely, becoming sullen and unhappy when other people are happy or successful.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Consistently placing personal needs above the needs of others and becoming angry and accusing people of &#8220;being selfish&#8221; when they refuse to comply with demands.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Consistent complaining that they have been harmed &#8220;look what you did to me&#8221; while quietly trying to control and undermine others.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Quietly trying to get other people to engage in destructive or illegal acts.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Giving gifts for the purpose of putting a person under control because that person now, &#8220;owes them.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Attempting to break up friendships or marriages or engaging in other acts that isolate people and make them more vulnerable.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Lying about people around them.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Engaging in gossip and rumor mongering.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>These certainly aren&#8217;t the only indicators of a passive aggressive personality, but they are easy to spot.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Here are some things you should not do around a passive aggressive personality.<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u00a0Don&#8217;t keep a journal of everything they say and then confront them when they contradict themselves. This is guaranteed to make you rise to the top of the passive aggressive&#8217;s Enemy List.<\/li>\n<li>\u00a0Do not try to force a passive aggressive into a corner, just to win an argument. They can turn aggressive very quickly.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t bother trying to talk sense or make agreements. Passive aggressives don&#8217;t make sense and agreements were made to be broken.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t take what the passive aggressive does personally, he or she does the same things to everybody else.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The tendency is to fight back. After all, you don&#8217;t deserve to be treated this way.<\/p>\n<p>he problem is that passive aggressive people are at war with the world and will take any counter attack as proof that you are at war with them. They are fighting a long ago battle that they lost and are now perpetually trying to win.<\/p>\n<p>The best way to handle a passive aggressive person is to see that they get professional therapy.<\/p>\n<p>If that&#8217;s not possible, then get away from them at the earliest possible opportunity and stay away.<\/p>\n<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>\n<o:DocumentProperties>\n<o:Version>14.00<\/o:Version>\n<\/o:DocumentProperties>\n<o:OfficeDocumentSettings>\n<o:AllowPNG\/>\n<\/o:OfficeDocumentSettings>\n<\/xml><![endif]--><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><!--[if gte mso 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